mini_cooper4
Autotechnik Ace
- Messages
- 5,775
My name is Adrian and I've just turned 23.
I don't know why but my whole body is shaking and I can't stop.
It's been my most successful year in my whole life and I'm not talking about money or cars.
My life I see as a game in which I'm trying to keep my soul alive and the last couple of years were again a real challenge for me. I'm emotional now and that's the only reason I'm posting this topic but I had to share it and couldn't resist.
IF I share my thoughts now I may prevent other people from falling in same traps as I did.
I am success, business and sport people see me as success... but the thing they don't see is that "success is my only f*ckin option... failure's not".
In my teenage years I've been through many surgeries and interventions just because I had a tumor in my head, actually I still have it. Because of that I couldn't have exactly normal teenage years and that was even a barrier for my sports carrier... a barrier I successfully broke and became successful in motorsports.
Even tho doctors were saying I'll die in two weeks if I don't have another surgery... now 5 years later I'm still alive just because of positive thinking... another success... I'm ALIVE!
Right after that I was able to find The Girl... someone I never dreamed for but someone that became my everyday dream. She was mine but I kept dreaming about her every time I woke up next to her.
The grocery store was my India when I was with her. Yes, you'll say I was just a boy, but trust me I wasn't a boy even years before that... I had to become a man or simply die.
I know what's pain and sleepless months and I know what it's like to see that even in your mothers eyes there's not much hope for you to survive anymore. I know what it feels to almost die.
The girl... she crashed with a motorbike... almost died and when I saw her I couldn't recognize her as her head has been rolled on the asphalt for too long... so I couldn't love her anymore. Now I ADORED her. She was everything I was living for and I knew what I have. I killed our relationship with my feelings and craziness. It hearts every day since that day...
My father was rich but he never gave me money and he wasn't always next to me. Our situation now is that he owes me money but he doesn't want to pay them back. Rich kid? Hah, try again!
At one moment I had no money to eat and I was paying 20 cents to friends to give me a cigarette just to feed my soul at least and try to get my self together.
My best friend, my brother... he's not calling since 2010... and many more things that I'm GRATEFUL that happened to me. Because I owe my success, my life, what I am to that experience, that pain, that feelings, that people, to ME. I love my life!
A story too long for just a boy... I wish I could've been a boy and not the man I had to be.
I'm 23 and I'm all on my own for quite a lot of time now... no real friends anymore, no sponsorship from parents, no wife to hug when I get back home after working 16 hours... I'm 23 and I drive a fancy car... I'm a spoiled kid in people's eyes. And most of the time I can't stand myself for being as slow as I am in what I'm trying to achieve... happiness
Each dream achieved gives you the strength to achieve the next one and that's why I cannot afford to stop at any point.
I don't know why but my whole body is shaking and I can't stop.
It's been my most successful year in my whole life and I'm not talking about money or cars.
My life I see as a game in which I'm trying to keep my soul alive and the last couple of years were again a real challenge for me. I'm emotional now and that's the only reason I'm posting this topic but I had to share it and couldn't resist.
IF I share my thoughts now I may prevent other people from falling in same traps as I did.
I am success, business and sport people see me as success... but the thing they don't see is that "success is my only f*ckin option... failure's not".
In my teenage years I've been through many surgeries and interventions just because I had a tumor in my head, actually I still have it. Because of that I couldn't have exactly normal teenage years and that was even a barrier for my sports carrier... a barrier I successfully broke and became successful in motorsports.
Even tho doctors were saying I'll die in two weeks if I don't have another surgery... now 5 years later I'm still alive just because of positive thinking... another success... I'm ALIVE!
Right after that I was able to find The Girl... someone I never dreamed for but someone that became my everyday dream. She was mine but I kept dreaming about her every time I woke up next to her.
The grocery store was my India when I was with her. Yes, you'll say I was just a boy, but trust me I wasn't a boy even years before that... I had to become a man or simply die.
I know what's pain and sleepless months and I know what it's like to see that even in your mothers eyes there's not much hope for you to survive anymore. I know what it feels to almost die.
The girl... she crashed with a motorbike... almost died and when I saw her I couldn't recognize her as her head has been rolled on the asphalt for too long... so I couldn't love her anymore. Now I ADORED her. She was everything I was living for and I knew what I have. I killed our relationship with my feelings and craziness. It hearts every day since that day...
My father was rich but he never gave me money and he wasn't always next to me. Our situation now is that he owes me money but he doesn't want to pay them back. Rich kid? Hah, try again!
At one moment I had no money to eat and I was paying 20 cents to friends to give me a cigarette just to feed my soul at least and try to get my self together.
My best friend, my brother... he's not calling since 2010... and many more things that I'm GRATEFUL that happened to me. Because I owe my success, my life, what I am to that experience, that pain, that feelings, that people, to ME. I love my life!
A story too long for just a boy... I wish I could've been a boy and not the man I had to be.
I'm 23 and I'm all on my own for quite a lot of time now... no real friends anymore, no sponsorship from parents, no wife to hug when I get back home after working 16 hours... I'm 23 and I drive a fancy car... I'm a spoiled kid in people's eyes. And most of the time I can't stand myself for being as slow as I am in what I'm trying to achieve... happiness
Each dream achieved gives you the strength to achieve the next one and that's why I cannot afford to stop at any point.
Why in this forum? There are real people everywhere and there are some in here too. That's why I participate. It's my Birthday and cars are not important for me today 
I thought it is for sale but didn´t read it is allready gone.
